Managing conflicts through social skills

Managing conflicts through social skills

We all have conflicts without a doubt and we constantly complain about it (of course nobody likes to have them) but very little we stop to think about how to solve them or deal with them. Either we do not realize or we are very interested in taking them into account. We need to have the social skills needed to face them, handle them and of course, relate properly. Next we will see how we can face conflicts (if we do not want conflicts to face us) through these skills:


  • 1 What are Social Skills?
  • 2 What are the social skills?
  • 3 How can we manage and resolve conflicts with social skills?

What are social abilities?

They are skills that help us interact with others in a socially accepted way and valued by others in which there is a benefit to both parties. We all have them in some way, of course some use it better than others and others don't even know they have it (and can develop them).

What is the importance of social skills?It is important in everything we do, in any place and context, and with anyone. It helps us to have the following:

  • In the home: Better affectionate relationships, greater confidence, good self-esteem, greater family union and, greater adaptability and coping.
  • In the classroom: Greater meaningful learning and social integration, active and confident students (not aggressive or fearful), greater communication between student and teacher.
  • At work: Labor behaviors, affective and effective, ability to work in teams and negotiate, resolve conflicts and adversities.
  • And for every moment: Good regards, mutual respect, correct way of behaving according to the occasion that deserves it, handling verbal and nonverbal communication, clear and cordial language, safe and reliable attitudes, etc.

What are the social skills?

There are many but among the most important we have:

  • Listen carefully, praise, ask politely, know how to ask and answer, do not react angrily, have impulse control, do not manipulate or be manipulated, ask permission, share things, help others, negotiate, defend and respect rights, know resolve conflicts, know how to win without exaggeration and know how to lose, not humiliate, know and express feelings adequately, accept criticism and criticize without offending, spontaneously participate, do not speak low (or third parties) or bluntly, know how to say thank you, greet with respect, apologize immediately at the right time, give condolences, compete loyally, congratulate someone who deserves it, return foreign things (without waiting to be asked), demonstrate positive attitudes, etc.

How can we handle and resolve conflicts with social skills?

We must constantly have and develop the following in ourselves and others (and above all be sincerely willing to learn them):

  • Being assertive (Know how to relate and express what we feel, want and want with firmness and security).
  • Being proactive (have initiative, motivation and foster good relationships in various fields and levels).
  • Have self-knowledge (Be aware of the way we act and think about each one of us).
  • Have empathy (Knowing how to reach others with real conviction, communication and participation).
  • Being leaders (Know how to guide, manage, encourage and manage the group or groups with good ideals).
  • Being conciliators (Knowing how to find solutions for both parties and not for oneself without any convenience).

Victor Nakama Hokamura
Clinical - Labor Psychologist. Ricardo Palma University, Lima - Peru.